Virgin Islands style lessons
August 19th, 2007, 7:14 pm · Post a Comment · posted by Sam Mittelsteadt
A few lessons learned on last week’s trip to the Virgin Islands:
(1) Women get very excited if you text them and ask their ring size. I found these "Anellobomb" Murano glass rings at a store on St. John called Into the Blue, and grabbed one in gold for my sister and one in a garnet color for my friend Sharyn. (I wanted the lime green, but they didn’t have it in either of the sizes I needed.) My friend Heather bought herself an Argento pendant in white. Shoppers in the Virgin Islands don’t pay sales tax! If you’re stuck in the States, the store also sells via e-mail or phone. (1a) If you are in doubt, buy one or two extra. You can always hold onto it for an awesome last-minute birthday or holiday gift.(2) If you get something that called a Marine Algae Body Wrap at the spa, there is a good chance that you will smell like leftover sushi for at least part of the treatment, thanks to the seaweed they paint you with. (Luckily, you get to rinse it off.) (2a) Do all the other stuff — steam room, exercise, sauna, shower — before most treatments, since they’ll lotion you up good and you don’t want to sweat it out.
(3) Don’t wear brightly colored toenail polish around iguanas, since they’re attracted to it (probably because the toes resemble little berries or flowers, which they would like to eat.) (3a) The day to learn this would be *before* you go down to feed the iguanas with your toenails painted an "I’m on vacation! Who cares?!" metallic orange.
(4) Satin is a good material for a dress only if you plan to never, ever sit down in it. (4a) Shrugs draw a horizontal line right across your rib cage, which is not a great idea if you are not a size 4. (4b) This is why you should take a look at, or ask your friend to tell you, what you look like from the back before you go out.
(5) And in a final, non-style-related note, if this is the view from your hotel room, the fact the air conditioning is out for a day and a half is not that much of a bother. Bring hats and don’t forget your SPF — 15 or higher!
